I am pretty certain that this question is thrown at me on daily basis. Mostly from men. My usual response? "Because God is my main man right now and I'm putting all I have into my writing. I don't have time for a relationship."
Below is my thought process behind my usual response, my own personal truth.
Okay, so I truly believe that God has a plan for a future relationship that does not include any of the following:
Crying in my pillow for hours on end-without compassion from the man
Being lied to consistently
Cheating on me with booze, drugs or women
Emotional, verbal, mental or physical abuse (especially not gaslighting http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gaslighting)
Flip-floppity indecision and confusion
My partner speaking to women with hinting or blatant sexual innuendos
I want to marry you, I'm falling in love with you, you're the woman of my dreams, I love you...wait, I don't know what I want
I was too busy to call you (and it's been a whole day)
No accountability for inconsideration
Bad mouthing my family or friends
Expectation of sex before there is a promise of love
Oy vey! I've battled with a good portion of that list for too long! They just weren't right for me or we weren't right for eachother, or or or the puzzle should simply be left on the freakin' floor and I stay single! Honestly, I just recently wrote a poem to a guy who wanted to be my guy, letting him know that my heart was a bit hardened from past experiences. So, obviously, I'm not ready to step back out there yet.
Are my expectations high? I don't believe so. My standards are though, most certainly.
I used to be Miss Pollyanna of love. I believed...I trusted...I put in a lavish amount of effort based upon how I felt, how many times I heard the I love you's or other flattery and by how many thoughtful gifts I received...even before several months into the relationship. Only did I ever listen and believe from the men, "Oh, my ex had issues." I could have kicked my own butt several times for not trusting my own gut that something didn't feel right.
I've heard it been said that When You Know Better, You Do Better. Well darnit, I'm looking up and trusting that God is in charge of picking and I'm not to go into any relationship full-force with a Pollyanna veil of lust and infatuation wrapped around my brain. I want to marry my best friend who puts God first, preferably sober, highly intellectual and can make me laugh and dance until the sun rises from time to time.
So, that is my perspective on why I am still single. Plus, women are absolutely amazing and way more fun to hang with and confide in at this time in my life. And maybe, just maybe, Bradley Cooper will be single by the time my friends and I go see him perform on Broadway next summer in the play The Elephant Man. He is damn smart and sober! Ha! A girl can always dream. :)
So, passionate ladies, can you relate?
Always enjoy hearing your thoughts and stories. Just click on the ButterFlySober link below to view my profile and/or send a personal email. Thanks and have a fabulous day!